My friend Katy’s two month old daughter Shaundi died unexpectedly yesterday. Her pain? I can only imagine.

It’s consuming almost every thought of mine, from the moment I read her words “Please, please pray like you’ve never prayed before” on Tuesday night.

I can’t stop praying for Katy.

I can’t stop cringing every time I lay Isaac down to sleep, praying he’ll wake up.

I can’t stop feeling this horrible sickness in my stomach, chest and throat.

I can’t stop crying for her family.

I can’t stop any of this. I can’t bring Shaundi back.

A dear friend texted me this morning. I had shared all of this with her last night and she was praying for me and for Katy and she wanted to share with me part of her devotional from “Jesus Calling.” I wanted to share it with you as well, because even though I don’t understand why things like this happen, I know there’s only one way through it:

“I am your Best Friend, as well as your King. Walk hand in hand with Me through your life. Together we will face whatever each day brings: pleasures, hardships, adventures, disappointments. I can bring beauty out of the ashes of lost dreams. I can glean Joy out of sorrow, Peace out of adversity.”

Sometimes really crappy things happen. Friends get cancer. Babies die. I won’t pretend to understand any of it, because I don’t. I won’t pretend that it’s right, because it’s wrong. I won’t pretend that I don’t doubt my God, because it wouldn’t be true. But I have to believe that there is redemption somewhere in it. Because if I don’t believe, there is no hope.

And right now, in this very moment, I will rejoice that Isaac is already awake from a very short nap, rather than be annoyed. Because he is AWAKE. And ALIVE. And I will be thankful.


If you’d like to help Katy’s family financially, please click on the “Love for Shaundi” ad to the right and donate there.

4 thoughts on “Consumed

  1. chrisgharmon

    Oh Katie, this post resonates so much with me. I wish these things didn’t happen. I don’t understand why they do.
    I keep typing & then erasing, because really there are no words…

  2. Pingback: Consumed | Indy Geek GirlsIndy Geek Girls

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